Some people just can’t stop talking. They are good storytellers that can hold a room full of people captive for hours on end. While this comes naturally to some people, there are others who find it hard to start a conversation, let alone keep it going. The good news is, you can develop great conversation skills even if you’re the quiet type.
In this article, you will learn ways to be talkative and the nuances of great conversation. This will make it easier for you to have meaningful conversations with almost anyone.
Tips on How to Be Talkative
1. Find A Common Topic
The greatest fear for most shy people is having nothing in common with the person they want to converse with. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to make sure you pick a topic that will interest anyone you want to strike a conversation with.
If you are at a party, you can start the conversation with small talk about the party. It doesn’t have to be anything deep or important. Something as simple as ‘how do you find this party?’ can start a long interesting conversation.
2. Never Use Lame Jokes or Pickup Lines
Starting a conversation with a lame joke or a pickup line is discouraged as the other person might not like it. Unless you're very lucky, pickup line and jokes lead to dead ends in the conversation.
3. Be A Good Listener
If you really want to learn how to be talkative, you have to learn how to focus on other people more than you do on yourself. There is nothing as annoying as having a conversation with a self-centered person. Be a good listener, nod your head occasionally and smile. It is very easy to keep a conversation going by letting the other person guide the conversation.
4. Always Use Open-Ended Questions
Open-ended questions offer the other person the chance to talk and become part of the conversation. Questions like “how was your day?” or “how are you?” guarantee an answer that will determine the direction of the conversation.
5. Focus on The Body Language
As much as you are trying to be talkative by engaging different people in conversations, there are people who won’t be interested. If someone doesn’t want to talk, it is best not to force it. You can tell a lot from a person’s body language. You will learn when to move on to other people, when to change the topic, or when to listen without interrupting.
Closed body language is expressed when the individual is not really paying attention to you and is instead focusing on other things. Crossed arms are a sign of disinterest. If you see such signs, just move on to the next interesting person.
6. Recalling Previous Conversations
Want to learn a quick tip on how to be talkative? Remember previous conversations. If you are meeting someone for the second or third time, you can build up a friendship by picking up from where you left off the previous time. You can start a conversation by asking them how things have been since you last saw each other. If there was a project they had shared about, ask them how it is going. You can get a wealth of data to converse about from previous conversations.
7. You Can Dive in Deep
People are always talking about themselves. They can go on for hours. Use this to your advantage when holding conversations. Allow people to open up to you by going deeper. Probe the person you’re talking to and let them share their innermost self with you. Most people will be more than willing to share their opinion on different issues.
8. Always Think Out Loud
When engaging other people in conversations, don’t be afraid to air your views and thoughts on the subject. This is what makes a conversation interesting. Shy people have the tendency to think of perfect answers to questions and taking long before they answer. When having a conversation, don’t be afraid to answer questions posed to you based on your understanding of the topic. Learn how to think on your feet.
9. You Can Change Topics
It is normal for a topic to die out. This creates room for awkward silence. To avoid this, always be ready to transition to another topic. While it may seem random, it will keep the conversation going for longer.
10. Be in The Know
Want to be a great conversationalist? Stay up to date with the latest news. Be it politics or entertainment, it is always important to know what is happening around you. Having a scoop on the latest news can be a great way to start or join conversations.
11. Never Make Assumptions
When learning how to be talkative, it is important for you to never make assumptions. Never assume that the person you are talking to is clueless about a topic. No matter how informed you are about the topic; always give the other person a chance to contribute to the conversation. Otherwise, you will come off as condescending. No one wants to converse with a know it all.
12. Taking Part in Group Conversations
If you are interested in joining a group conversation, it is important for you to do so within the first ten minutes of the conversation. This makes it easy for you to blend in and less likely to chicken out. If you join a conversation late, you will take time to catch-up and this takes away the time you would have used to contribute and grow your conversation skills.
As you work on your skills, be more conscious of the environment around you. Don’t be afraid to have interactions, no matter how small. Start a conversation with someone you meet on a bus or train. Smile at people in the streets. Give genuine compliments. All these will go a long way when it comes to helping you with your conversation skills.